Awesome joke

Angrez darwaza kholne ko hindi
me kaise kahega...

U dnt know......?

Mai batata hu......

Wo kahega "THERE WAS A COLD
DAY."

Say ten times khud samajh aa jayega..

awesome santa banta joke

Santa: When I was a child, Homosexuality was a Crime in India....... When I grew up, it was Acceptable......... & Now they making it legal......

Banta starts packing his bags and says: I'd better leave India before they make it Compulsory..... 

hindi joke

एक पागल भैंस के ऊपर बैठकर घूम रहा था।

दूसरा पागल बोला: तुझे पुलिस पकड़ेगी।

पहला पागल: क्यों?

दूसरा पागल: अबे हेल्मेट नहीं पहना।

पहला पागल: अबे नीचे देख, four व्हीलर है।

facebook status

now achieving # success is not enough!!!

posting it to # facebook is the final move.

awesome status

I have been ignoring stupid people a lot these days, so if you haven't heard from me in a while that may be the reason.!! 

funny joke

1 admi ki 6 ungliya thi sb log use Radhe Shyam kehte the,, batao Q.??



















kyu ki Radhe shyam hi uska naam tha,, faltu Dimag mat lagaya karo...

girls joke

UNIVERSAL TRUTH

Help a girl when she is in trouble,
and
she will surely remember you
only when she is again in trouble..

status for facebook

The hardest thing in the world is fixing a heart you didn’t break.

status for facebook

I love my relationship with my bed. No commitment needed. We just sleep together every night.

wives jokes

Once a month, wives go completely crazy for about thirty days

wife joke

A wife can make you a millionaire. Only if you were a billionaire.

Awesome status

Taash ke patton mai ikka aur zindagi mai sikka.....!!
Jab chalta hai na bhai.. Toh duniya salam karti hai.....!!!

Selfie picture

inspirational good morning message

Sometimes You are Unsatisfied with Your Life, while many people in this world are Dreaming of Living Your Life..

A Child on a Farm sees a Plane fly overhead & Dreams of Flying
'But,
A Pilot on the Plane sees the Farmhouse & Dreams of Returning Home.
That's Life!
Good morning!!!

awesome girl joke

लाख टके की बात बोल रहा हूँजरा ध्यान देना।
अगर पैसा पेड़ पर उगता तो..!!
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
लड़कियां बंदरों से भी सेट हो जाती।

kamine dost joke

KAMINE DOST:

A broken lover's emotional status on Facebook:

"I want her Back...!"

Friend's Comment:
"Even I agree.....her front is not that good.!"

student joke

Geography Teacher: Agar koi chota planet prithvi se takraye toh kya hoga?

Student: "Tadang" jaisi awaaz aayegi

Sir gusse se: Kyu  ??

Student: Kyoki "Ye Duniya Ye Duniya Pittal di...!"

love shayari

Mere lafzon ki pehchan agar kar laite woh,
Unhe mujse nahi khud say muhabbat ho jati..!!!

hindi status

कौन है इस जहाँ मे जिसे धोखा नहीं मिला,
शायद वही है ईमानदार जिसे मौक़ा नहीं मिला... 

hindi status

मुझे मालूम है कि ये ख्वाब झूठे हैं और ख्वाहिशे अधूरी हैं..
मगर जिंदा रहने के लिए कुछ गलतफहमियां जरूरी हैं !!!

15 sunny leone selfies

http://m.mensxp.com/entertainment/celebrity-photos/22699-15-sunny-leone-selfies-that-prove-she-is-the-hottest-woman-ever-p15.html

hindi status

मौत को देखा तो नहीं, पर शायद वो बहुत खूबसूरत होगी,
कम्बख़त जो भी उस से मिलता है, जीना छोड़ देता है..

single boys joke

To all my male friends...

Hugh Hefner - 87 years old, has a 27 year old wife.

Berlusconi - 77 years old, has a 27 year old girlfriend.

Maradona - 52 years old, has a 22 year old girlfriend.

Dighvijay Sing - 64 years old has a 34 year old girlfriend.

Moral: Don't worry if you don't have a girlfriend, she probably isn't born yet !

bengali joke

“Bengali women ....

 How nicely they introduce their husbands..

"Yeh homaara POTY hai"


naughty joke

U'll die laughing........

Son: "Daddy, I fell in love & want to date this awesome girl👰!"
Father: "That's great son. Who is she?"😯
Son: "It's Sandra🙋, the neighbor's daughter".
Father: "Ohhh I wish you hadn't said that.
I have to tell u something son, but you must
promise not to tell your mother.
Sandra is actually your sister."😐

The boy is naturally bummed out, but a couple of months later
Son: "Daddy, I fell in love again and she is even
hotter!"
Father: "That's great son. Who is she?"
Son: "It's Angela, the other neighbor's daughter."
Father: "Ohhhh I wish you hadn't said that.
Angela is also your sister." 😐
This went on couple of times and the son was so
mad👹,
he went straight to his mother
Son: "Mum I am so mad at dad! I fell in love with
six girls🙋👰🙍 but I can't date any of them because daddys their father!"
The mother hugs💞him affectionately and says:
"My love, you can date whoever you want.
Dont listen to him He isn't your father."
Son  Fainted...!!!
😆😆😆😆😆😆

joke in marathi

ऐक नवरा आपल्या
बायकोला इंग्लिश शिकवत
असतो

ऐका दुपारी त्याची बायको
त्याला जेवण घेवून ऐते
अहो हे घ्या डिनर
नवरा : वेडी आहेस का
याला डिनर नाही म्हणत
लंच म्हणतात
:
:
:
मूर्ख आहात तुम्ही .हे काल
रात्रीच उरलेलं जेवण
आहे.

awesome summer joke

Dear Suraj Bhagwan🌞

Please go to settings>display>brightness and lower your brightness! 

Please its too hot to handle!!

😩😩😩

status for relationship

Relationships are worth fighting for, but you can't be the only one fighting!! 😎

status for facebook

It's good to have an open mind.. What irritates me is your equally open mouth..!! 

awesome hindi status

खेरात में मिली हुई खुशी
हमे पसंद नही है

क्यूंकि हम गम में भी
नवाब की तरह जीते है...!!!

मुझे एक  ने पूछा
"कहा रहते हो "

मैंने कहा
"औकात मे "


साले ने फिर पूछा
"कब तक ?"

मैंने कहा
"सामने वाला रहे तब तक "




Attitude तो हम
मरने के बाद भी करेंगे ,

लोग पैदल चैलेगे और
हम कंधो पर रहेंगे।

awesome thought in hindi

जब भी मौका मिलता है खुद से माफ़ी मांग लेता हूँ..

सबसे ज्यादा दिल तो मैंने ही मेरा दुखाया है..|।।

movies in marathi joke

If these movies were dubbed in marathi.....


KUCH KUCH HOTA HAI-
Kasatari Hotay...

HOLLOW MAN- Pokal Manus...

DIE ANOTHER DAY- Nantar Kadhitari Mar...

GONE WITH THE WIND- Gela Udat...

SUPERMAN- Lai Bhari Manus...

FANTASTIC 4 - Rapchik Chowge...

SCORPION KING- Tatya Vinchu...

THE MUMMY- Aai...

THE MUMMY RETURNS- Aai Parat Aali...

MISSION IMPOSSIBLE- Nahi Jamat.!

MISSION IMPOSSIBLE II- Ekda Sangitla Naa Nahi Jamat.!

MISSION IMPOSSIBLE III- Aee Kutrya Nahi Jamat Bollo Naa..!!

IRON MAN- istri wala..

THOR - Hathodi Fekun Marel...

MEN IN BLACK- Kali Manse..!

MEN IN BLACK 2- Ekdum Kali Manse..!!

MEN IN BLACK 3 - Itki Kali Manse Ki Disat Ach Nahi...!!!!!!



awesome pappu joke

Pappu juice wale se :-
Jaldi se juice de ladai hone wali
hai....

ek glass pine ke baad....
ek glass aur de ladai hone wali
hai......

woh bhi pene ke baad......
ek glass aur de jaldi ladai hone
wali hai.....

juice wala :- kab hogi ladai.....????.

Pappu :- Jab tu paise mangegaa !!

best tag line for indian summers

Best tag line for summers- Keep calm and Eat Aam 🍋🍋...

Awesome Middle finger image

Status for facebook

Sometimes You Face Difficulties Not Because You're Doing Something WRONG...

But Because You're Doing Something RIGHT !!

frustrated employee story

Chintu ko na milta tha aaram.
Office main karta kaam hi kaam

Chintu ke boss bhi the bade cool
Promotion ko har baar jate the bhool 👓

Par bhulte nahi the wo deadline
Kaam to karwate the roz till nine ⏰

Chintu bhi bannah chahta tha..d best
Isliye to wo nahi karta tha rest

Din raat karta wo boss ki gulami 👬
Appraisal ke ummid main deta salami

Din guzre aur guzre fir saal ⛅
Bura hota gaya Chintu ka haal

Chintu ko ab kuch yaad na rehta tha
Galti se Biwi ko woh Behenji kehta tha

Aakhir ek din Chintu ko samjh aaya
Aur chodh di usne Appraisal ki moh maya

Boss se bola, "Tum kyon satate ho ?"
"Appraisal ke laddu se buddhu banate ho" 😾

"Promotion doh warna chala jaunga"
"Appraisal dene par bhi wapis na aunga"

Boss haans ke bola "Nahi koi baat" 😈
"Abhi aur bhi Chintus hai mere paas" 😑

"Yeh duniya Chintuon se bhari hai"
"Sabko bas aage badhne ki padi hai"

"Tum na karoge to kisi aur se karaunga"
"Tumhari tarah Ek aur Chintu banaunga"

To all my employed friends....
Pls Forward to all the chintus.. 

awesome joke

Japanese  Proverb-

If One Can Do,
You Can Do.
If No one Can Do,
You Must Do.

Indian  Version-
If One Can Do,
Let Him Do.
If No one can Do
"Mi kashala Shanpana karu?

hindi joke

रोक दो मेरे जनाजे को अब
मुझमे जान आ रही हैं..



आगे से थोडा राईट ले लो
दारु की दूकान आ रही हैं ..

hindi joke

एक आदमी मेडीकल-स्टोर पर
गया:-
ज़हर दे दो भाई।

दुकानदार:-
बिना पर्ची के नही मिल सकता।
.
आदमी ने 'appraisal letter'
दिखाया।
.
दुकानदार:-
बस पगले रुलाएगा क्या !
बड़ी बोतल दूँ या छोटी?😀😭😱😜😜

responsibility joke

> Sense of Responsibility............

> 

> A man goes to library n ask for a book on Suicide.......................😦

> 

> Librarian looks him n  says

> 

> Bhai wapas kaun dene aayega???"

march end joke

 Yamraj 10,000 logo ko narak le ja rhe te,
raste me naradji mil gaye.
Naradji-itne sare 1 saat?"
yamraj bole- "march ending hai bhai, target pura karna hai"

modern style wedding

Modern Style wedding

Pujari: Do u Both Agree?
to Change Your Facebook Status to MARRIED??

Couple: Yes, we do

Pujari: Vivah sammpan. 

I love you image

Best pick up line image

Its better to cheat image

Best autocorrect image

I am not an alcoholic image

sunny leone joke

Motivational statements

Always Remember Charlie Chaplin's 3 Heart touching statements:-1st- Nothing is permanent in this world, not even our Troubles..2nd- I like walking in the rain, because nobody can see my tears..And3rd MOST IMP- the most wasted day in life, is the day, in which, we have not laughed..Keep Smiling and Pass it to.everyone whom you want to see smiling  😀

batman look

Free wifi password

Fake it -Image

Love image

Marathi joke image

Pet of thor - hilarious

marathi joke

Boy : hi

Girl : hiiiiiiii

Boy :what r u doing....?

Girl : nothing,(कंटाळून)....... and u....?

Boy : Chatting with the most beautiful girl in the world.........

Girl :(लाजून, गालातल्या गालात हसून)...hoka....


Boy : ho na, ti reply det nahi mhanun tuzyashi bolatoy. 😛

Amazing 3d image

love image

BE HARPY IMAGE

OFFICE JOKE

HEIGHT OF BEZZZATI

never judge image

Paisa paisa

naughty joke

Madrasee girls are the naughtiest of all . . .

Know why?

Coz when all other girls say "Namaste", "Hi" or "Hello" . . .

They say, "WANNA CUM"...


awesome status

Hamari pyaas ka andaz kuch alag hain yaaro,

Kabhi samundar tak thukra dete hai,

Toh kabhi aasu bhi pee jaate hain... 

women joke

Message from a Man:

Happy Women's Day!! As if the other 364 days belong to us..!!

DEVDAS of 2014

DEVDAS Of 2014:

Maa Ne Kaha Facebook
Chod
Do!

Abba Ne Kaha Mobile Night
Package Chod  Do!

Doston Ne Kaha MobileSe
Balance Churana Chod
Do!

Paaro Ne Kaha Bacardi
Peena Chod Do!

Aur ek Din Aayega Jab Paro
Ke Bacche Bolenge,
Maamu Ab To Hamaari
Mummy Ka Peecha Chod
Do..

joke on women

When I cross a one-way road, I still look both sides just in case, there are any women driving!

Save girl child image

Holi joke image

Funny image

Women's day image

facebook exam image

happy women's day image

pappu joke

GirL A.T.M pe Pappu se..

Girl : bhaiya mujhe apna balance check
krna hai .. Aap meri help kar do please..

 Pappu ne use ek zor ki laat marta h or
ladki gir jati hai.

Pappu : tera balance to bahot khaRAb hai

Naughty shayari

Branded naughty shayari:

If I was Nike and you were McDonald's (wah wah),

If I was Nike and you were McDonald's (wah wah),

Baby, I would have been "just doing it" and you have would been "just loving it"..

Valentines day image

Valentine day joke

Valentine Day Quote: "Jidhar Apna Crush Hai,
Saala.... Udhar Pehle Se Hi Rush Hai"

Valentine day joke

Valentine died for love,
Romeo also died for love,
Jack in titanic died for love,
Samson in the Bible died for love,
Greek heroes Hercules & Achilles died 4 love.
Even Jesus Christ died for love!
where are the women?

Don't buy any woman a Valentines treat/ Gift/ Diamond ring this year until she gives u atleast 5 names of women who died for love...
Because no woman would die for love...

Wake up guys...

Jaago Boyfriends jaago.

Marathi joke image

married joke image

valentines day joke

New year tha toh sab 25 days pehle hi wish karne lage...

3 din baad 26 Jan Republic Day hai, 

Par Koi Msg Nahi,

Sharam aati Hai sab pe..

Anyways..





Happy Valentines Day In Advance..

how to burn fat

Valentine day image

girl joke

Boys require 100% talent to get a success.


But girls require only 4% talent

&

Remaining
36
24
36 gets it done.

awesome status for guys

Bachna bachna sab kare...

bach sake na koye...

kitni bhi girls ko propose karo,

last me we are just friends ka drama hi hoyeee..

facebook status

Virginity is like a soap bubble, one prick and it is gone....!

budget 2014 joke

joke image

joke on girls

Ladki: Is mirror ki kya
keemat he??
SHOPKEEPER : Rs.1000 !
.
.
Ladki: ohh.. bahut mehnga he..
kya isme koi khas baat he??
.
.
SHOPKEEPER: aap isko 100
floor se niche girao,
.
ye mirror 99 floor tak nai tutega...
.
.
.
Ladki :Wow..PACK kardo bhaiya!

joke in marathi

एकदा १ लहान मुल स्त्यावर हगत असतो... .
तो दोनदा पादतो...पुर्रर्रर्र...पुर्रर्रर्र... .
डुकरीन 🐼आणि तिचे पिल्लु हे सगळ बघत
असतात...
.
पिल्लु : आई मला भुक लागली आहे. . डुकरीन : थांब बाळ अजुन एक शिट्टी होउ दे
मग जेऊ..

joke for facebook

 janaza of aashiq is nikla from the gali of mehbuba with very zor-shor,....

 janaza of aashiq is nikla from the gali
of mehbuba with very zor-shor,....

The mehbuba jhaaki from the door & boli- Mar gaya haramkhor"

girl joke image

aaj kuch toofani karte hai picture

joke for whatsapp

Jab ghar me bacha paida hota hai

Maa: iski naak to mujhpe gai hai

Baap:iski ankhe to mujhpe gai hai

Chachu:iske hath to mujhpe gaye hai

Mama:iski smile to mujhpe gai hai

Aur jab wahi bacha bada hoke ladki chhedta hai tab
sab bolte hai: pata nahi haramkhor kispe gaya hai...

motivational image

emotional image

funny image

status for facebook

Learning from your mistakes makes you smart.. 

Learning from other's mistakes makes you a genius..!! 

joke for facebook

How to kill a BOY.....??

Just give him a mobile with lots of beautiful Girls mobile number.

Then Lock him in a place with "No - NETWORK coverage " !!!

***

How to kill a - GIRL..??

Give her a beautiful dress, nice jewellerys, costly cosmetics... 

Then, lock her in a room " without a MIRROR " !!!"

mumbai joke

If a Wada-pav wala makes more money than An
Engineer,
YOU ARE IN MUMBAI.

If you see BMC cleaning up every morning and in the
evening its all the same,
YOU ARE IN MUMBAI.

If high class people also dont leave the panipuri stall
without asking for Sukhapuri,
YOU ARE IN MUMBAI.

If the rikshawwala's and Panwala's are more
accurate than Google Maps,
YOU ARE IN MUMBAI.

If a Chaiwala at marine drive explains his
struggle at 2'o clock in the morning.
YOU ARE IN MUMBAI.

If Bike Riders shout at you for not locking your car
doors properly,
YOU ARE IN MUMBAI.
Marathi's abuse Biharis and Biharis abuse
Marathis and still if they live together,
YOU ARE IN MUMBAI.

If a girl can move around alone at late nights safely,
Its..
Because
YOU ARE IN MUMBAI.

In a breathtaking crowd of locals, if an poor old lady
always gets a Hand to cross the bridge,
YOU ARE IN MUMBAI.

When some idiots blame Mumbai,at the same time if
you find people sayn "AAmchi Mumbai" is the Best
Place to live.
YOU ARE IN MUMBAI.

Last one for the people outside Mumbai,
If you find anyone taking Care of you without any
Reason, its not that they are idle Its Because,
WE ARE MUMBAIKARS.!!

- By Anonymous Mumbaikar

awesome status for facebook

The TRUTH hurts, 
but it doesn't kill..

LIES may please, 
but they don't heal.

gujarati joke

A Gujarati Bhai & Chinese in a train......

A cockroach enters...
Chinese catches it & eats it!.....

Another cockroach enter...
Gujju catches & asks d Chinese Kharidega...????

Ice fall in jodhpur

love image

girlfriend jokes

Bf : Pack Ur Bag SweetHeart,
 I've  Won 10 crores In a Lottery..

Gf: Wow !!! Now London ya
Switzerland???

Bf: Who Cares ???
U Just Pack Ur Bag & GET LOST..

love meaning

Nice line from HITLER:

"War is better than love,

Bcoz

At the end of war u either live or die..

But

At the end of love,
U neither live nor die..." :

good morning image

good morning image

good morning thought

1) Everyone has two Eyes ... But
No one has the same View..."
2) Alphabet"O"stands for Opportunity which is absent in Yesterday"Available only once in"Today", And thrice in"Tomorrow"
3)"Human beings are very strange.
They have ego of their knowledge
but, they don't have knowledge
of their ego".
4) People who judge do not matter. People who matter do not judge.
5) The most important quality of successful people is their willingness to change..
6)"Pain Is Unavoidable but,
Suffering Is Optional"
7) Only messages are not life , but ...... our life should be a message to others!

Read this message twice...
It's a really meaningful message.
Gud mng ⛅

alok nath joke

Sunny Leone to Alok Nath -

U can touch me anywhere baby .. 

Alok Nath touches her head and says "jeeti raho beti" 

Love image

Miss you image

Alok nath picture joke

joke in marathi

मुंगी: एक विचारेन म्हणते.
हात्ती: विचार की.
मुंगी: तुझं वय काय रे?
हात्ती: मी पाच वर्षांचा आहे.
मुंगी: काय सांगतोस काय... फक्त पाच वर्षं
आणि तरी तू एवढा प्रचंड?
हात्ती: हा हा हा... आय अॅम अ कॉम्प्लॅन बॉय. बरं
मला सांग, तुझं वय काय गं?
मुंगी: माझं वय पण पाच वर्षं
.
हात्ती : अगं पाच वर्षं वय
आणि केवढीशी दिसतेस...
मुंगी: वही तो... आय अॅम संतूर गर्ल.
मेरी त्वचा से मेरी उम्र का पताही नही चलता...

motivational image

Joke in hindi

भाई को भाई से जुदा कर देती है 'GF'
..............
मां को बेटे से जुदा कर देती है 'GF'
.............
पति और पत्नी के बीच झगड़ा पैदा कर देतीहै 'GF'
..............
इंसान को दुनिया से जुदा कर देती है 'GF'
..............
घर में झगड़ा करवा देती है 'GF'
...................
'GF' का मतलब
गलत फहमी, जो इस वक्त आपको हुई है।
..............
'गर्लफ्रेंड' तो बेचारी मासूम होती है...

miss u image

Creative image

good night images